The Pain has subsided. Right now this flame of anger is in my control. I froze it in the bottom of my heart. It's only a matter of time though, until an explosion occurs. My icey cold heart. Something I melted a long time ago.

The first girl I ever loved taught me to have faith. Not just in God, but in the ones I love. She taught me a lot actually. I am who I am because of her. One thing to this day I never learned though was how to "forgive and forget". Not even for her.

Her and I haven't been together for almost 3 years now. What was once love between us in now only a memory to our families and closest friends. It doesn't even exist anymore. Well, not the same love we had anyways. I can only see her like my little bratty sister. Nothing more. But I still never learned to forgive her.

How do I forgive Molly now? I can't even forgive and forget something that doesn't even matter to me anymore. Is it even possible to "forgive" if you can't "forget"?

"Everything will fall apart. Even the people who never frown will eventually brake down." ~ Pushing Me Away by Linkin Park

How long can I go on like this? Ignore it and it will go away? This is actually the little "theory" that caused this pain and assualt on my heart... my soul.

"The sacrafice of never knowing...." ~Pushing Me Away by Linkin Park

If I never knew what Molly did would I have to "forgive and forget"? Or is it actually better to know what kind of person she really is before I decide one day to give my heart to her? Before I devote my life to her? Even if it means loosing her? For all I know she can do it again behind my back and not tell me about it. She could get away with it again. How do I know she won't do it again?

I have heard the saying "Once a cheater always a cheater". Is this true?

I mean I understand that once you have cheated on someone, you can NEVER EVER say "I have never cheated on anyone" again. But does this mean that if they have cheated once they will cheat again? I just don't know...